training

The Instructor Connection and Your Personal Dojo

I was a teenager when I started my Kempo training. I didn’t own a car; if I couldn’t get a ride from a friend, I would jog to the studio. The dojo wasn’t far away, but it was straight uphill. On a clear day, rare back then, you could see Mount Baldy looming in the background just a dozen miles off. No matter how many times I ran that slope, it never seemed to get any flatter. Regardless, eventually, I would round the corner and look towards the studio.

A Shift

Just seeing a karate studio can create a shift in your state; the anticipation of the training—the sweat, challenge, and camaraderie—brightens your mood and lightens your step. Every class was a chance to improve, to become somehow better than I was before. Each obstacle overcome is the process of fulfilling our destiny one little bit at a time. And camaraderie… It’s funny, many people think of the martial arts as a solitary pursuit, but those who have ever set foot in a dojo know that the people on the journey with you are what makes it all real. A good training partner will both challenge you and ground you.

And so it was. I walked into the dojo to be separate from life for a few hours. I shook hands and hugged my friends and compatriots in ways that we can’t right now. I warmed up in a space dedicated to martial arts, not a corner of my living room. We worried about getting punched, but we never worried about contagion.

Different Now

It is all different now. We all miss our dojos and that feeling arriving there.

But that was only part of the story—it was always only part of the story. Those who describe the martial arts as a solitary activity aren’t right, but they aren’t entirely wrong either. Training with a partner is better; there is no denying that. But understand: your training comes alive in the relationship between you to your instructor. That has always been true, but in the absence of other variables, it becomes more apparent and more striking.

We all miss the joy of arriving at the studio, meeting training partners, and making contact. But for now, we need to focus on ourselves and that connection with our instructor. Bring that into focus, challenge yourself, and rise to the challenges that your Sensei holds out in front of you. Use this opportunity to grow in all of the different ways available to you.

Your Personal Dojo

Eventually, we’ll train together again, and we’re all looking forward to that. But for now, move the furniture out of the way, put on your uniform and belt, warm up and connect with your instructor from your personal dojo.

Kempo Essay: Joe

Joe is a seventeen-year-old who has been training for more than two-thirds of his life. As he eludes to, he doesn’t remember a time when he was not a Potomac Kempo student. Recently, we had the honor to promote him to Second-Degree Black Belt, an honor that only a handful of others have achieved before graduating high school. We are very proud of Joe and are excited to see all of the great things he will accomplish in life with this solid Kempo-based foundation.

Kempo has had an immense effect on my life, and I can confidently say that I would be a very different person without the experiences I have had at the dojo. Physically, of course, the practicing of Kempo is the source of much of my exercise, keeping me healthy and fit. This, however, in my opinion, is overshadowed by what Kempo has taught me about life. There are so many real-life lessons that I have learned from my training that I cannot possibly recount them all, so I will share with you a few of the ones that I think are most important. First, there is always a way to improve anything you are working on. Whether it is Kempo two or differential equations, there is always going to be someone who is better at it than you, and if you listen to them, you will improve. This teaches us humility and the value of having a teacher.

Another thing I have learned from Kempo is that to become good at something you need more than the effort put in; you need commitment, enthusiasm, and friends to help you along your journey. The amount of these things I have had has varied along my Kempo journey, and this has shown in my progress. Kempo taught me the importance of these factors, and now I strive to find them in all projects that I pursue. Finally, Kempo has gone even beyond teaching me simple lessons, it has altered my outlook on life. I cannot truly say what I would be without Kempo because I barely remember a time before I started training, but I know that Kempo has taught me patience over the years. And that putting in lots of effort for a distant reward is worth it eventually. It takes practice to remember a Kempo, even more, to be able to do it well. The same is true for life and Kempo helped to demonstrate this for me beyond what other experiences ever could.

Thank you for teaching me,
Joe

Kempo Essay: Emily

I have two wonderful daughters and a wonderful husband. I have full time job that is challenging and, I believe, meaningful. As a mother, wife, and leader I have a lot of responsibilities and keep very busy. I needed a little time and an opportunity to focus on being a better me – to take care of myself so that I can be there for my family, those I lead, and those I serve. I studied martial arts when I was younger and really enjoyed it. I joined Potomac Kempo because I hoped that I would find the opportunity I needed – to improve my fitness, to challenge myself mentally and physically, and to have fun.

My first goal was to make Potomac Kempo part of my routine. With the support of my family, I have been able to be at the dojo three, and even sometimes four, times a week. Doing so while still being there for my family, those I lead, and those I serve has been a major achievement. A second goal was to improve my fitness. Over the last year, I have worked to incorporate fitness into my routine, finding opportunities to run, ride, or swim a couple of times a week. Since joining Potomac Kempo, I have been more active. I have blocked, punched, kicked, and had a lot of fun. A third goal was just that – to have fun, to find an activity I enjoyed that would benefit me not only mentally and physically but also emotionally. I look forward to going to the dojo, and I return to my daughters, my husband, and my job a little bit tired, a little bit fitter, and a little bit happier.

My ultimate goal is to be the best me I can be – to be the best mother, wife, and leader that I can. I believe that Potomac Kempo can help me achieve that goal. I hope to continue to make Potomac Kempo a part of my routine. At times doing so will be a challenge, particularly as my family’s needs change and the demands of my job grow, but I know that I need to take care of myself so that I can be there for my family, those I lead, and those I serve. I hope to continue to improve my fitness – to increase my endurance, strength, and agility. I hope to improve those techniques that I have learned, to learn new techniques, and to gain confidence in my ability. I am eager to learn Kata 1, Kempo 3, and much more. Finally, I hope to keep having fun because as long as I am having fun I will come back to the dojo and because having fun is an important part of being the best me that I can be.

Martial Arts are for Real People

I was extremely fortunate, oh, those many years ago, when I wandered into a martial arts studio for the first time. Fortunate that I found Kempo but more so because I found Sensei Alen—now Master Alen Babayan. Sensei Alen ran a fantastic studio full of interesting people who were inspired and inspiring. What struck me most about the people in Sensei Alen’s studio was that they were real people. They weren’t tough guys or meatheads; no one was training for a full-contact fight in Thailand, and no one had ‘Kempo’ tattooed on his head. They were just ordinary people who had discovered that Kempo was a great way to become healthier, happier, and more well-rounded.

To be honest, I wasn’t yet a real person myself—just a teenager excited about the world he had walked into. I often trained with a lawyer who had kids my age and drove a high-end sports car. One woman, whose son was taller than me, was a Ph.D. and did research that totally went over my head. Another gentleman I worked out with ran a huge electronics distributor. They were all real people. They had jobs and lives, and families and priorities. The only thing we had in common was that Kempo was one of our priorities.

At the time, I didn’t appreciate what I had found. Years later, as I began to teach, meet other instructors, and visit other studios, I realized how rare Sensei Alen’s haven of ‘real’ really was.

That was long ago and thousands of miles away. Now I’m a real person too, with a wife and children and my own competing priorities. But Kempo is still one of those priorities—to train, teach, and share what I started learning from Sensei Alen a quarter century ago. The vision I still hold of that haven for real people continues to be our inspiration and motivates us to create that same sort of space where real people can gather to learn and grow.

I am so grateful to Sensei Alen for being who he is and for creating that space for so many of us to learn and grow. And I’m grateful to all of the real people who choose to train with us now. I’m grateful that amidst their jobs, lives, and families, they choose to be part of our haven of real people.

With gratitude
Chris Santillo, Shihan